Friday, August 7, 2009

A few jokes to ease the pain

Just thought I would try and ease the pain of last nights game. I had an erie feeling that the announcer had just jinxed us when he said with runners on 1st and 3rd that "The only way the fans won't get to see Manny (Ramirez) is if Ethier hits into a triple play or he hits a home run." Unfortunately for us it was the latter. I think quick enough to knock on wood or maybe I could have prevented the disaster, who knows. Any way I don't think it is to far off to say that the Dodgers were extremely lucky last night. Their first 2 runs came off botched plays and hit and runs where balls when through holes vacated by fielders who were moving to cover a base. Pierre's hit was a swinging bunt down the 3rd base line the Furcal reached on a high bouncers that went through the hole left by LaRoche holding Pierre on first. The Braves deserved to win that game, but it doesn't always work out that way so here are a few jokes to brighten up the morning.

What is the lowest point in the U.S.A.?
-Greg Norton's batting average

A few weeks ago Bobby Cox pulled Soriano after having the walked the first 3 batters he faced. When he got to the dugout he threw his glove down and started cussing. Moylen asked him why he was so upset and he replied, "Cause the idiot pulled me when I had a no-hitter going".

If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life,she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base.

It was so foggy today that the Nationals couldn't even see who was beating them.

One morning in elementary school, the students were going to a geography class. The teacher wanted to show the students where cities and states are.
The teacher asks the class, "Does anyone know where Pittsburgh is?" Billy raises up his hand and says, "Yeah, Pennsylvania!". The teacher replies, "Very good, Billy!, now can anyone tell me were Detroit is?"
Suzy raises her hand and says, "That's in Michigan!" The teacher again says, "Very good."
Trying to confuse the children, she now asks, "Where's Kansas City?" Tommy raises his hand and says, "Oh Oh Pick me!!!, I know?" The teacher says, "OK, Tommy where is Kansas City?"
"Last place."

What is the difference between Rafael Soriano and UPS?
UPS knows how to throw a strike.

Here's to hoping today's game goes a lot better than yesterday's.

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